I'll get candles and my mom's lace tablecloth.
And since it's Rachel'
...I thought I'd poach a salmon.
What?
Question. Why do we always have parties where you poach things?
You want to be on the food committee?
Question 2. Why do we always have parties with committees?
Why can't we just get pizza and beer and have fun?
I agree. Fancy parties are only fun if you're fancy on the inside.
And I'm not sure we are.
You don't want it to be special?
Fine. You can throw any kind of party you want.
Joey, they're not real!
I start miles beneath the surface of the things. They're fake.
See? Honk, honk!
Wow, it's like porno for clowns!
Wow, it's like porno for clowns!
Wow, it's like porno for clowns!
Neither of Rachel's sisters can come.
I still have to invite Dylan and Emma and Shannon Cooper.
No Shannon Cooper.
Why not her?
She steals stuff.
Or maybe she doesn't and Joey slept with her and never called her back.
Joey, that is horrible.
Hey, I liked her.
Maybe too much.
I don't know.
I guess I just got scared.
I'm sorry. I didn't know.
I didn't think anyone would buy that. Okay!
Hi, honey. How did it go?
It was the graduation from hell.
My cousin went to hell on a football scholarship.
It's suppod to be a joyous occasion.
Nobody thought my sister would graduate from college.
It's a testament to what a girl from Long lsland will do for a Celica.
What happened?
My parents happened.
All they had to do was sit in the same stadium,
...and not talk about the divorce. But no!
They got into a fight during the commencement address.
Bishop Tutu actually had to stop and shush them.
You know the good news?
I get to rve coffee for the next eight hours.
I guess we don't invite her parents.
-How about just her mom? -Why her mom?
Becau I already invited her.
Did you ask Stacy Roth?
Can't invite her.
She also steals.
Here are the candles. Where's the birthday cake?
We're not having birthday cake.
We're having birthday flan.
Excu me?
It's a traditional Mexican custard desrt.
That's nice.
Happy birthday, Rachel. Here's some goo!
Dr. Greene!
Oh, my God! It's Rachel's dad.
Why are you here?
The father can't e the daughter on her birthday?
No, no, the father can.
But since I am the roommate, I can tell you she's not here.
And I'll pass along the message. Okay? So bye-bye.
You're having a party.
No, no, not a party.
Just a surpri gathering of some people Rachel knows.
-This is Phoebe, Chandler and Joey. -I'll never remember all that.
So what's the deal?
Rachel comes home, people pop out and yell stuff? Is that it?
This isn't your first surpri party, is it, sir?
Hi, Monica.
The Chine menu guy. Forgot the menus.
So basically, just a Chine guy.
Dr. Greene, come with me. We'll put your jacket on Rachel's bed.
All right. That sounds like a two-person job.
Well, my goodness! What was that?
Sandra, I thought you were Rachel. We weren't ready for you yet.
-You thought I was Rachel? -Yes, becau you look so young.
And becau you're both, you know, white women.
Oh, I misd you kids. Should I put my coat in the bedroom?
-No, I'll take that for you. -Oh, well, thank you.
Such a gentleman. Thank you.
It all looks so nice. So festive. All the balloons.
Oh, the funniest thing happened to me on the way here.
-I was driving -That's great!
I can't wait to hear the rest, but I have to go to the bathroom.
Hey, come with me.
-What? -lt will be like we're gal pals.
You know, like at a restaurant. It'll be fun! Come on.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
Think. Think.
What would Jack and Chrissy do?
Okay, now that your coat is safely in the bed
We can come back out in the living room.
Joey and Chandler, it's time you take Dr. Greene over to your place.
Yes, absolutely.
Why, again?
Becau that's where the party is, you goon!
-See, this is just the staging area. -Right, it's the staging area.
This is clearly in the wrong apartment.
All right, you guys are off to party number one.
You are off to party number two.
All right, let's keep it moving, let's keep it moving.
At least nd some women to my party.
Okay, that's Ross. All right.
Okay, they're coming.
Thank you for such a wonderful dinner.
Thanks for being born.
