Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Language for Advocates, Counlors, and Practitioners in the Anti-Sexual Violence Movement Lesbian, Gay, Bixual, Transgender, Queer or Questioning
(L G B T Q) Language
This FAQ resource was created using questions and comments from individuals in the anti-xual violence movement. Respons and guidance were provided by practitioners working to further the LGBQT movements. This resource is intended as a guide for personal reflection, individual and agency education, and strengthening
culturally-specific respons to our communities.
What words can advocates u with all clients to create affirming spaces?
There are many different ways to communicate. Creating an affirming space takes both verbal and nonverbal communication. Verbal communication includes the words you say to a victim*, but also the words they hear and e throughout your agency. Addressing all forms of communication, from speaking to creating signs, helps create an inclusive environment. Nonverbal communication includes
body language and posture – how do we physically respond when someone disclos? Do we lean in? Do we back away?
Speaking practically, the language you u should mirror the language of the person you are rving. For example, if a survivor identifies her significant other as her “partner,” u that language. Validating the language and using open-ended questions to allow for flexibility are best practices when trying to create a space where individuals feel comfortable sharing personal information.
A uful approach might be to e the inclusiveness of a center is only as strong as the staff member or volunteer who is least comfortable or knowledgeable. It is important that all staff feel skilled in rving survivors who identify as LGBTQ –it should not be the focus of one staff member alone. In order for inclusive practices to be effective, they must become part of agency practice and overall approach. What words/terms are NOT recommended? When discussing language, remember the “Terms Paradox” (e the FORGE handout list below for more details). In short, the paradox states that while language and terms are important, they are also meaningless. In other words, how one person may identify may not be how another person identifies. For example, a survivor identifies her partner as a woman, but does not identify as a lesbian. It is not your responsi
bility or role as an advocate or practitioner to “help” her come out, but to respect her relationship and her way of describing that relationship. Listen carefully and with the intention of understanding. There are some words, however, that may be inappropriate or offensive if ud in marketing, outreach materials, or agency signs.
∙Do not u “homoxual” This term has a long history with the medical and psychiatric fields –
it was long ud to put down or insult
individuals who identified as lesbian or gay.
Although some people may identify with this
word on an individual level, it should not be
ud in outreach materials or published
resources. Staff and volunteers should be
trained not to u this word, but should also be prepared to have someone identify this way.
∙Do not u “tranny,” “transxual,”
“transvestite,” or “crossdresr” when
referring to or doing outreach to individuals
who identify as transgender. The words do
not reflect the majority of identities in the
transgender community. They can be incredibly offensive given the stigma and stereotypes our
society has around the words.
What about the word “queer”?
The word “queer,” much like “homoxual,” has a
could help avoid asking questions for the sake of curiosity alone. Coming out is a negotiation of safety.
Here are some helpful tips for communicating in a mindful and intentional manner:
∙Name.“Hi there. My na me is Suzanne, you can call me Suzie.” This opens up the door for an
individual to give you the language they want to u.
∙Pronouns.“I prefer female or feminine pronouns. Can I ask what pronouns you
prefer?”
∙Body Parts. During a forensic exam, the SANE us the term “penis” to describe the body part she is examining. You know that the client
identifies as a woman. “Is that a term you feel
comfortable with? Is there something you
would prefer the nur to u in the future?”
∙Relationship status.“I not iced you left
relationship status blank on the form. I want
you to feel safe and comfortable – is there
anyone I can call to be here with you?”The
effort you put into creating a safe space for a
survivor to share their own way of describing
themlves and their relationships builds trust.
As you begin working with a survivor ask for
guidance on how much information they would like you to disclo (e.g. “When we talk to the
police would you like me to share anything
about your xual orientation or gender
expression”). This allows them to make a
decision and you can take on the role of
assisting in a teachable moment with other
systems. If you are comfortable in your
conversation with the other system it allows for them to share in this new found safe space. How do we engage our center staff, volunteers, and communities in conversations about language and respect?
It is important to lead by example. Practice respectful and inclusive language consistently, both individually and as an organization. Asss the skills and knowledge of staff and volunteers and work to address tho gaps through training and education. Silence might be the most pressing issue – no one is talking about it at all and information can help break that silence.
Be as proactive as possible in establishing a plan for training, policy, and practice. Give people opportunities to practice language and get feedback in a space that is focud on learning and growth, not judgment or punishment. People should be held accountable for any disrespectful language, but this can be done by providing examples of appropriate language and practice.
Other reflections:
∙We cannot be effective if we don’t feel safe.
Allow yourlf to step aside if you ever feel as
though you cannot intervene or provide a
“teachable moment” without endangering
yourlf. There are other ways to support
inclusiveness and respect – find the strategy
that works best for the context. It is important
to note that, when safe, public action is going to be the most effective in changing social norms
and attitudes.
∙When engaging community partners who may not be receptive to using inclusive language or
practices, focus on shared goals and values. For example, faith communities may ek to
cultivate justice and peace in their world –
the values are central to your work too!
