英语幽默小笑话大全

2024年3月21日发(作者：莫友芝)

英语幽默小笑话大全

1.a kiss

At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech

when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, nt him a piece of paper with the

word "KISS" scribbled on it.

The guest ated next to the speaker said, "Your wife must love you very much, I e her

nd you a 'KISS' before you begin your speech."

The speaker smiled and explained, "You don't know my wife. The 'KISS' she give me stands

for 'Keep It Short, Stupid.'"

2.a great man

Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?

Student: Of cour. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.

一名伟人

老师：如果莎士比亚还活着，他会是一名伟人吗？

学生：当然。因为到目前为止，还没有人活到400多岁。

your ticket

Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station,

the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single

ticket.

"How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks an accountant. "Watch and

you'll e," answers an engineer. They all board the train. The accountants take their

respective ats but all three engineers cram into a restroom and clo the door behind

them.

Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He

knocks on the restroom door and says, "ticket, plea." The door opens just a crack and

a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The accountants saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference,

the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money (being

clever with money, and all!) When they get to the station they buy a single ticket for

the return trip.

To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all. "How are you going to travel

without a ticket?" says one perplexed accountant.

"Watch and you'll e," answers an engineer. When they board the train the three accountants

cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs.

Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom

where the accountants are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "ticket, plea."

4.

Two Cute dogs

A man walks into a shop and es a cute little dog.

He asks the shopkeeper, "Does your dog bite?"

The shopkeeper says, "No, my dog does not bite."

The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him.

"Ouch," he says, "I thought you said your dog does not bite!"

The shopkeeper replies, "That is not my dog."

Two Cute dogs

A man walks into a shop and es a cute little dog.

He asks the shopkeeper, "Does your dog bite?"

The shopkeeper says, "No, my dog does not bite."

The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him.

"Ouch," he says, "I thought you said your dog does not bite!"

The shopkeeper replies, "That is not my dog." 苏子玮