Boston Legal
Helping Hands
Season 2, Episode 12
Written by David E. Kelly
2005 David E. Kelley Productions. All Rights Rerved.
Broadcast: January 17, 2006
Transcribed by Imamess of JSMP for Boston-Legal
Paul Lewiston, Shirley Schmidt and Brad Cha are in Paul’s office at Crane, Poole and Schmidt.
Paul Lewiston: Shirley. I am not going through this again!
Brad Cha: Could someone catch me up here?
Shirley Schmidt: Denny got engaged.
Brad Cha: Mazeltov?
Paul Lewiston: No Mazeltov.
Brad Cha: Well, who is it this time?
Paul Lewiston: Beverly Bridge.
Shirley Schmidt: The women Denny ‘Craned’ in the coat room at that charity dinner last week.
Paul Lewiston: If this Bev turns out to be another Angie. Oh god.
Brad Cha: Angie?
Paul Lewiston: Number four.
Shirley Schmidt: Wife number five was no picnic either.
Paul Lewiston: Clovis.
Shirley Schmidt: She almost got him to retire, pull his equity out of the firm and move to Boca.
Paul Lewiston: Clovis nearly sunk us.
Shirley Schmidt: Half the staff quit.
Paul Lewiston: And she was drunk the day President Ford stopped by. Alright, I’ll pull out Denny’s last prenup. See if I can water al it. Shirley. You talk to the woman, get her story. Brad. Check the partnership agreement. We have to make sure there are no loopholes in the mandatory buyout in ca of partner’s death or incapacity.
Brad Cha: One thing.
Shirley Schmidt: What?
Brad Cha: Is there any remote possibility we could be over reacting here?
In Denny office music starts playing. Denny and Bev each have a microphone in their hands. They start singing karaoke.
Denny Crane and Beverly Bridges: I’ve had the time of my life. I’ve never felt this way before. Brad, Shirley and Paul peek around the corner. Yes, I swear, it’s the truth. And I owe it all the you ‘cau I had the time of my life.
Brad Cha: I’ll get the partnership agreement.
Denny Crane and Beverly Bridges: I’ve never felt this way before. And I owe it all to you. You, you, you, you, you.
In Judge Judge Gordon Kolodny’s courtroom.
Clerk: Docket number two four nine six three five. Commonwealth versus Jerald Epnson. Attempted murder, assault, assault with a deadly weapon, battery, xual battery, fal imprisonment, torture, terrorist threats.
Alan Shore: Alan Shore for the preposterously charged Mr Espenson.
A.D.A Frank Gingsberg: Frank Ginsgerg for the Commonwealth.
Judge Gordon Kolodny: How do you plead?
Alan Shore: Not guilty by reason of temporary insanity.
Judge Gordon Kolodny: As to bail?
Alan Shore: We ask that Mr Espenson be relead on his own recognizance.
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A.D.A Frank Gingsberg: Commonwealth oppos bail.
Alan Shore: You can’t be rious! Your Honor! This incident was an aberration. Mr Espenson is an upstanding member of his community, is not a danger to society, and he has a family counting on him at home. Frank Ginsberg steps back to whisper to Shirley.
Judge Gordon Kolodny: He has dependants?
Alan Shore: Her name is Linda.
A.D.A Frank Gingsberg: Your Honor. Let the record show that his dependent is a gecko Mr Espenson threatened to kill his boss in her place of business and has a history of violence. He could be a flight risk.
Alan Shore: Flight risk? The man can’t even hail a cab! He turns to Jerry. Sorry.
A.D.A Frank Gingsberg: It is incumbent on the Commonwealth to protect at large if, God forbid, he’s relead and hurts someone el.
Judge Gordon Kolodny: Bail is denied. Defendant shall be remanded into custody immediately.
Jerry Espenson: Mealworms are in the fridge. I need to feed Linda. I need to get home.
Alan Shore: Jerry, I’ll feed Linda.
Alan and Shirley are walking in the corridor at Crane, Poole and Schmidt.
Alan Shore: Sexual battery, torture, terrorist threats? That isn’t justice, disproportionate retribution. And good for you, you’ve enlisted the one procutor who’s running for D.A. next year. Tell me. How big was your campaign contribution? And is there a matching fund here at the firm we can all go in on?
Shirley Schmidt: It was sizeable and speak to Kim in accounting.
Alan Shore: Jerry Espenson never intended…
Shirley Schmidt: Do not start defending him to me, Alan.
Alan Shore: I agreed to defend him. That’s why he put down the knife.
Shirley Schmidt: No you agree to reprent him. No one here meant for you to defend him.
Alan Shore: Shirley. No one is denying what this man has done to you. But he should at least get a fair trial.
Shirley Schmidt: Oh by all means, let’s get a fair trial for the man who tried to slit my throat.
Alan Shore: Lets!
Shirley Schmidt: Understand that everyone at the firm is considered a witness. Don’t expect anyone to help you. Or speak to you.
Alan Shore: And won’t that make for a refreshing change? He walks away.
Paul Lewiston:He comes up. Shirley? Have you talked to Denny’s fiancé yet?
Shirley Schmidt: I’ve been a little busy, Paul.
Paul Lewiston: I’m working on the prenup. But we need you to find out her intensions.
Shirley Schmidt: You’re the one with the kind eyes. I don’t do girl talk.
Paul Lewiston: Do I have to remind you how rious this situation is? If Denny becomes incapacitated… or should I say I say further incapacitated, this woman could become his Nancy Regan. She’d have his power of attorney. She could bring down the firm.
Shirley Schmidt: I’ll talk to her.
Deni Bauer is in her office at Crane, Poole and Schmidt packing her briefca. Daniel Post knocks on the door jamb.
Deni Bauer: Daniel?
Daniel Post: Came to take you to lunch.
Deni Bauer: I can’t. I have a ca.
Daniel Post: What is it?
Deni Bauer: A high school teacher is eking a temporary restraining order against one of her student’s parents. They’re hounding the woman day and night about the daughter’s grades.
Daniel Post: Helicopter parents.
Deni Bauer: Helicopter parents?
袋鼠运瓜Daniel Post: Well, that’s what they call ‘em now. Yeah, parents who hover around their kids, trying to control every aspect of their lives.
Deni Bauer: Oh, that would be the Gerings.
Daniel Post: Oh. Cool. I’m in.
Deni Bauer: What?
Daniel Post: I wanna cond chair. I mean, why not? I got my law degree. I keep up my MCLE’s.
Deni Bauer: Have you ever actually tried a ca?
Daniel Post: No, but I’ve always wanted to. I mean think of it as the Make a Wish Foundation granting a dying kid his fantasy. Deni gives him a look. If that kid were a rich guy in his forties. Besides I could probably help you. I’m on the board of Lexington School. My kids ud to go there. We deal with helicopter parents all the time.
Deni Bauer: Well, that could be helpful. I would have to get the client’s approval though.
Daniel Post: I can get that.
Deni Bauer: I would have to get one of the partners to agree.
Daniel Post: Looks like a partner right there. He walks up to Denny. Daniel Post.
Denny Crane: Denny Crane.
Daniel Post: I’m a client.
Denny Crane: I’m a partner.
Daniel Post: CEO Christberg and Phelem.
Denny Crane: My name is on the door.
Daniel Post: I love the offices.
Denny Crane: Thank you. I love your hair.
Daniel Post: I got a plane.
Denny Crane: Indeed?
Daniel Post: Could u a little more color though.
短发圆脸Denny Crane: I’ll make a note. My fiancé lls office furniture.
Daniel Post: Congratulations. I’d love to meet her.
Denny Crane: My club. Thursday. They rve reubens
Daniel Post: I’ll take you flying. Oh, by the way, I’d like to try a ca with Ms Bauer over here?
Denny Crane: Why not? See you Thursday.
Daniel Post: Thursday. Deni is amazed. That’s what I do. I make connections. That’s how we met! Remember? Shirley walks down the corridor at Crane, Poole and Schmidt. She walks into Alan’s office. He’s there with Jerry. And Linda.
Alan Shore: Shirley, I believe you know my client.
Shirley Schmidt: Why isn’t this man in jail?
Alan Shore: He has an excellent attorney. Who filed an emergency writ with Court of Appeals and the Judge agreed that denial of bail was an abu of discretion. I’m surprid your lackey at the D.A.’s office didn’t keep you abreast of this. Perhaps you didn’t tip him enough.
Shirley Schmidt: He’s not to be in this building. I’ll get a restraining order if I have to.
She leaves.
Jerry Espenson: She hates me.
Alan Shore: Tempers em frayed all around. That’s why I’m filing for a continuance. We’ll everyone cool down a bit then try again for a plea bargain.
Jerry Espenson: No! Plea bargain’s out of the question. It’s not guilty or nothing.
Alan Shore: But you are guilty Jerry. A whole office full of people saw you do it. One of the junior associates took a video of you on his cell phone. He’s thinking of entering it in a film festival.
Jerry Espenson: No plea bargain!
Alan Shore: Proving temporary insanity is a daunting task, you know that. A plea bargain is our best chance to keep you out of jail.
Jerry Espenson: If I plea bargain I’ll be disbarred. Alan, my whole life is the law. It’s all I have. It’s what I love. You can’t let them take that away from me.
Alan Shore: Then we go to trial.
Garrett and Alan are in Alan’s office at Crane, Poole and Schmidt.
Alan Shore: Look up any ca law, any articles, new reports, anything that supports the theory that stress in the work place can lead to an individual losing control of themlves. Especially in the form of a voilent outburst.
Garrett Wells: Got it. He starts to leave and meets Shirley coming in. He quickly hides the clipboard he’s holding.
Shirley Schmidt: Hello, Garrett. You’re not helping Mr Shore on the Espenson ca becau you’re a witness. I’m sure you’re aware that would be a conflict of interest?
Garrett Wells: I was just getting him coffee.
Shirley Schmidt: Yeah. Well, you can’t do that either. I’ll take it decaf though. Thanks.
Garrett Wells: Thank you. He leaves.
Alan Shore: Shirley, I know we’re fighting, but there’s no reason to take it out on the children.
Shirley Schmidt: Alan. This looks like it could be tough on you. Especially since you don’t have an assistant anymore. Shirley leaves and Melissa comes in carrying a box.
Alan Shore: Shirley fired you?
Melissa Hughes: Wor. I got transferred to human resources where all the people persons are.
Alan Shore: She’s building a Chine Wall.
Melissa Hughes: What’s that?
Alan Shore: It’s a legal concept. It keeps anyone in the firm who may be involved in this ca from talking to me about it.
Melissa Hughes: Well then you’ve got a big-ass wall around you.
Alan Shore: Shirley’s just trying to rattle my cage. It’s only a temporary transfer.
Melissa Hughes: So you won’t be mad if I ignore you in the hall and just look at your shoes. I need my job.
Alan Shore: I’ll try to wear nice shoes.
缩手缩脚培训计划怎么写In Judge Peggy Zeder’s courtroom. Traci Carpenter is being questioned by Deni.
Traci Carpenter: They call me at night, on the weekends they email, text message my cell phone, they drop by for parent-teacher conferences, they challenge every grade, every assignment. The last straw was when my sister was delivering her baby and I was her coach. They called on my cell phone and when I said that Cathy was starting to crown they asked when she’d be finished so we could discuss Rachel’s paper on The Red Pony. It ud to be that teachers spent eighty percent of the time with the students and now we spent eighty percent of the time with the parents and it’s hurting the kids.
Deni Bauer: Thank you. She walks back to the table.
Daniel Post: Ahem, hem, hem, hem.
Deni Bauer: Excu me Your Honor, just one moment.
Daniel Post:In a whisper to Deni. The Judge doesn’t like her.
Deni Bauer: She doesn’t like me!
Daniel Post: You know who women do find charming? Me.
Judge Peggy Zeder: Ms Bauer?
Daniel Post: Let me ask a question. Just e how it goes.
Deni Bauer: I don’t know about that.
Judge Peggy Zeder: Ms Bauer?!
Daniel Post: Ms Carpenter. Ah, would you say it’s true that Rachel Gering is a good student?
Attorney John Hoberg: Objection! Leading the witness.
Daniel Post: Right. Sorry, I knew that. Sorry. Sorry. What kind of grades does Rachel get?
Traci Carpenter: She has between a B-plus and an A-minus average.
Daniel Post: And has the Gering’s attention done anything to change that grade?
Traci Carpenter: Not at all.
Daniel Post: One more question. Have the Gerings contacted any other teachers?
Traci Carpenter: All the other teachers. The one they hounded the most was Mr Chihee, the math teacher.
Daniel Post: How did he react?
Traci Carpenter: He quit. He couldn’t take it anymore so he took early retirement. I’m still twenty years away from that.
I was so excited to become a teacher. No one told me it would be this way.
Daniel Post: Nothing further, Your Honor. Unless, ah, you can think of anything?
Judge Peggy Zeder: Ha.
Beverly and Shirley are having drinks in a bar.
Beverly Bridge: I know what you want Shirley. And yes, Denny does still talk about you. He remembers his experiences with you so fondly. Did you know that he has a position called, ‘The Schmidt’?
Shirley Schmidt: Would that be the one where I read a magazine while he lies pasd out on the floor?
Beverly Bridge: That’s not what I heard.
Shirley Schmidt: Look Bev, I’m a busy woman so I’ll just get to the point. Who are you and what are you up to? Beverly Bridge: Oh. We’re going to have that conversation.
Shirley Schmidt: We are.
Beverly Bridge: So, you think I’m screwing Denny for his money and power?
Shirley Schmidt: It had occurred to me.
Beverly Bridge: Well, good news! I am. I find money and power just so appetizing. And why did you screw him? Shirley Schmidt: I lost a bet.
Beverly Bridge: Shirley. You know, I, I thought you were enlightened. But it turns out that you’re the worst kind of female there is. Either you condemn a woman as a whore becau she enjoys x…
Shirley Schmidt: I didn’
Beverly Bridge: … or you assume that she’s a manipulative gold-digger.
Shirley Schmidt: Ha, ha. Oh, Bev. You know, I’ve completely misread you. Here I had you pegged as some kind of predatory shark. Ha. I came here today with the intension of telling you that if you ever do anything to hurt my friend, Denny, or this firm I will e to it that you are hunted down legally and literally until you are penniless and left to troll airport bars looking for alcoholic pilots nearing retirement age. But I can e I don’t need to do that.
Beverly Bridge: You know it’s really hard to believe that you’re the one that came up with, ‘The Schmidt’. She leaves. Male patron:He moves next to Shirely. So, ah. What is ‘The Schmidt’?
Denny is in his office at Crane, Poole and Schmidt dancing alone to fast-paced Latin music. Alan co
mes up and knocks on the door jamb.
Alan Shore: May I cut in?
Denny Crane: I’m practicing for my wedding. Come and join me.
Alan Shore: Why not?
Denny Crane: No, no. No, no. It’s not on the one. It's not a mambo. It's a feeling, like a heartbeat. Kachunk, kachunk, kachunk.
Alan Shore: Shut up and dance, mister. Denny twirls Alan. This ca Shirley is pursuing against Jerry.
Denny Crane: I’m not allowed to talk about it. Vietname Wall.
Alan Shore: Chine Wall. She’s pressuring the D.A.’s office, she’s cut off all my resources here which is fine, it’s just getting a little crowded around the hotel room with the two paralegals I’ve hired from Harvard always underfoot.
Denny Crane: I can’t hear you over the wall. Hey! You’re a natural.
Alan Shore: Anything Denny Crane can do I can do backwards and wearing high heels.
Denny Crane: The feeling I get around here is that people aren’t that high on Bev.
Alan Shore: Haven’t noticed.
Denny Crane: Well I don’t care if nobody el likes her. It’s important to me what you think of her.
Alan Shore: I imagine I’ll like her.
Denny Crane: No Alan, I need a guarantee. And I’m not talking about getting to know her and forming your own opinion. I need you to like her!
Alan Shore: Denny? Just knowing you care for her makes me happy enough.
Denny Crane:He toyes with Alan’s fingers. I’m feeling a tension. You can’t have a very strong ca.
Alan Shore: Jerry Espenson was determined to make partner. He didn’t and that’s what made him snap.
Denny Crane: Well, what’s so special about that? All the associates wanna make partner. It’s the car
rot we dangle in front of ‘em to keep them working.
Alan Shore:He waltzes out of Denny’s arms. Excu me, Denny. He picks up the phone. Melissa I need your help.
I need access to some personal files.
Denny Crane:He sticks his fingers in his ears. Vietname Wall!!
In Judge Peggy Zeder’s courtroom. Attorney John Hoberg is questioning Gigi Gering.
Attorney John Hoberg: Are you concerned about Rachel’s college prospects?
Gigi Gering: Yes. Even the State schools have taken to admitting only the best of the best.
Attorney John Hoberg: Are you saying Ms Carpenter isn’t qualified to prepare your daughter?
Gigi Gering: No.But we would be remiss if we didn’t stay so involved. Our most important job is to prepare Rachel for her future.
Attorney John Hoberg: Nothing further.
Deni Bauer: Ms Gering? Are you saying that Ms Carpenter is a bad teacher?
Gigi Gering: No. I didn’t say that.
Deni Bauer: How would you rate her, B-minus? C-plus? What?
Gigi Gering: I don’t think I could really…
Deni Bauer: Becau she has won a teaching award. So, maybe if you’re not giving her a good enough grade it’s your problem, not hers? Is that possible?
Gigi Gering: I never said…
Deni Bauer: We know that you’re involved with a lot of other teachers.
Daniel Post: We just don’t want our teacher to get lost in the shuffle.
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Deni Bauer: And maybe you were having a bad day when you evaluated her.
Attorney John Hoberg: Objection!
Daniel Post: I don’t think you e her potential.
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Deni Bauer: We know that we don’t e how hard she works.
Daniel Post: She works so hard. The other teachers are playing, Traci’s inside…
Attorney John Hoberg: Your Honor?
Judge Peggy Zeder: Ms Bauer!
Attorney John Hoberg: Objection! They’re badgering the witness!
双城生活主题曲Deni Bauer: Of cour we’re badgering the witness!
Daniel Post: Did you just figure that out?
Judge Peggy Zeder: Objection sustained.
Deni Bauer: Thank you, Your Honor for sustaining the objection to the badgering of this woman. That’s what this whole trial is about. Let’s stop the badgering.
Daniel Post: Nobody should be able to do that sort of thing to anybody. Unless they themlves are actually a badger. In Judge Gordon Kolondy’s courtroom. A.D.A. Frank Ginsberg is questioning Shirl
ey.
A.D.A. Frank Ginsberg: In your opinion did Mr Espenson em insane to you?
Shirley Schmidt: No. He emed to know exactly what he was doing. He even negotiated for the rvices of Mr Shore as his attorney. He only agreed to spare my life on that condition.
