佳译汉译英常见拙译翻译
所谓contraction即a word, as won’t from will not, or phra, as o’clock from of the clock, formed by omitting or combining some of the sounds of a longer phra。Contraction貌似小事，
在英译中却频繁出现！似乎这是一种既方便又简约的表达方式。然而，从美国教授的评改中，我们忽然醒悟：在正式文体中，不要使用缩写
式！
程序英语1.在我的集邮册中，有一张邮票占据了最显著的位置。
原译：I’ve a stamp in the most conspicuous place of my album.
改译：I have a stamp in the most conspicuous place of my album.
小析：No contractions in formal essays.
2.我对担任教师工作充满了期待。
列日要塞
原译：I’m filled with the anticipation of standing on the teaching role.
改译：I am filled with the anticipation of standing in the teaching role.
3.别人觉得这是在浪费时间，我觉得这可是个好办法。
原译：…others think it’s a waste of time. But I think it’s a good system.
改译：…others think it is a waste of time. But I think it is a good system.
小析：This is suppod to be a formal essay. Do not u any contractions.
三、搭配（collocation）
“搭配”，是一个非常重要的语言概念。英语尤其讲究“搭配”。搭配意识，实际上体现了学生掌握词汇的深度。很多时候，学生只是粗浅地
孤立地记住了单词的中文释义，英译时生搬硬套对应的中文的搭配方式，而不知应当“整块记忆”，甚至以句型，或固定表达的形式记忆“
孤立”的单词。
汉语也讲究“搭配”，遗憾的是，目前传统的表达正在受到冲击。如：
电视剧《男人没有烦恼》的主题歌：“走出那沉甸的从前…”。按照“沉甸”的减缩法，“黑压压”就是“黑压”、“兴冲冲”就可以减缩成“兴冲”
了。电视剧《我想有个家》主题歌《牵手梦缘》，歌名和歌中“你我牵手梦能缘”的“缘”字，都是“圆”的错别字，而歌中反复吟唱的一句“好
人都祝好人的你，愿天下人一路平安”，前句宾语残缺，如果与后句构成复句，主语又混乱不明。
1.学生们很悠闲地坐在绿茵茵的草坪上，用吉他在弹奏浪漫的歌曲，有的漫步在树木夹道的通道上，尽情谈笑。古田精神
原译：The students are sitting leisurely on the green lawn, playing guitars with romantic
songs or walking in the tree-lined passages, talking and laughing heartily.
改译：The students are sitting leisurely on the green lawn, playing romantic songs on the
guitar, or walking along the tree-lined pathways, talking and laughing heartily.
小析：“在乐器上弹奏…乐曲”的习惯表达是play…on the (guitar), 此外，walking in the tree-lined passages
也不符合习惯表达。
2.你不相信吗？那你就试试吧。（kylepluto按：原文没有“那”字，不过我觉得不顺口，就加上了。还有就是，原文的例子是一路排序下
来，从1到41，我觉得看着不舒服，打字的时候就按照标题给例子重新编了号。）
原译：Don’t you believe? Just try!
改译：Don’t you believe me? Just try it!
app模板
小析：We only u believe intransitively when we talking about beliefs accepted across the
culture and by most people. If we talk about God, the rule of law, the right to free asmbly, speech, and press, or Santa Claus, then we can say “I believe!” But the essayist’s idea is not at the level---he is trying to convince the reader. In this ca, believe has to be ud transitively.
成绩排序
Don’t you believe me?
Don’t you believe what I am saying?
Don’t you believe that this suggestion will work for you?
陌陌聊天技巧And the partner ntence has to u the verb transitively, too. Just try it (out).
3.计算机科学
原译：the Science of Computer
改译：Computer Science
小析：这里的介词of用得不当。其实，英语中表示“的”的方法并不局限于这个介词，更多的是运用adjective-noun
construction。以Computer Science为例，名词computer修饰science的范畴和内容，而science 便成了被（名词）修饰的
对象。这样的现象在英语中十分普遍，又如earth science等等。
4.这餐饭让我失望。
原译：And the meals make me disappointed.
改译：And the meals disappointed me.
小析：这是一个初涉译林者常用的句型to make sb. p.p.，其实，英语更多地使用动词的主动形式，而少用其过去分词作宾语补足语
。
5.他有一颗善良的心，每当我向他请教问题时，他总是为我细作解释。
原译：He had a kind heart. Whenever I consulted him questions, he explained for me
carefully.
改译：He had a kind heart. Whenever I consulted him about my questions, he explained things客气的英文
for me carefully.
小析：注意动词的句型：consult sb. about sth.;且句中的explained最好用作及物动词。
6.要使我们的教育达到完美的程度，我们还有很长的路要走。
原译：It is a long way to develop our education to a perfect status.
改译：We have a long way to go in order to develop our education to an ideal status.
小析：(1)“We have a long way to go”是一种相对固定的说法，不宜轻易改变。
开学安全教育第一课(2) Nothing is perfect! “ideal” is acceptable.
7.如此一个目标确实能够给年轻人带来足够的力量去完成理想，足够的勇气去实现自己的梦想，远大的抱负。
原译：Such an active butt can surely bring the young full energy to fulfill his lifetime,
enough courage to realize his dream, and high expectation.
改译：Such an active goal can surely bring a young person energy to fulfill his dreams,
enough courage to realize his dreams, and high expectations to establish more…
小析：(1) butt一词确有goal的意思，但是Webster’s New World Dictionary已注明：Obs。而Obs 即obsolete（意思是
：the term or n is no longer ud but occurs in earlier writings）;
(2) the young 固然可以表示“年轻人”，但在本句中还是以a young person 作泛指为宜，因为，紧接着就出现了表示单数人
称的his（lifetime）；
(3) to fulfill his lifetime动宾搭配欠当；此外，dream和expectation两词在表示“理想”及“期望”时，作可数名词，
应加s。
8.最近，越来越多的人离开自己的家乡，涌入城市，去争取更好的教育和就业的机会。
原译：Recently, there are more and more people who leave their native places for flow into
