剧本部分
焦仲卿Johnny（J） 刘兰芝Lunch（L）
焦母Johnny’s mother（J） 刘母Lunch’s mother（LM）
太守之子Mayor’s 童心未泯英文son（MS） 强盗Burglars（A B C）
Prologue 旁白：Long long ago, there was a young man called Jonny, He has no achievement and no money. And he has an uncontrolled wife. He is very afraid of his wife - in other word, he respect his wife, if you are willing to think so.
（J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪）
J: Everybody says that I’m hen pecked, but in fact, I’m as strong as a tiger,（小声）while my wife is WuSong.
（指着上台处的门大声道）I’m not afraid of you!
（内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头）Then, I’m afraid of whom?
（《我在那一角落患过伤风》响起，唱词响起之前做悲痛状，随着“daladala”响起开始自白）在家可做的兼职My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood. She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me. All I don’t care. I only want her to be tender than me. But she is not! Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell! （停）
（内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J）
My God! Who can help me? （下）
Act1
（序幕结束时,JM作窃听状） 旁白：The mother-in-law doesn’t like Lunch. She always thinks that women should have quiet and work hard, everything all want to listen to their own husbands. And Lunch have borne no children until now, it made her very dissatisfied.
JM（拄拐棍上）:I can!
（对门内）Lunch! Lunch! Where are you?
L（扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来）:I’m here! What’s up mum?
JM: I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”.
L: OK. My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what’s up?
JM: Since you married my son you have behaved so badly. You have been solast day 脚踏实地英文rude, so brusque, imband so lazy……
L: But…… JM: Never interrupt me!
L: Never interrupt me! Since I married your son, that terrible Johnny, I have been working hard all day long, cooking and washing. I have raid soft pigs and ducks and chicken and……
JM: But all tho you have done are not valuable unless you have a son!
L（生气地挥动着锅铲）:Oh, you want a grandson, don’t you?（开始解围裙）Go and ask your son. I’m leaving! （扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下）
Act2
（LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上） 旁白：Lunch is very angry and sad, she returns home alone. Lunch’s mother doesn’t like Johnny. She thinks Johnny is stupid and poor.
L: Mum,benchmarking I’m back!
LM: You are back? Why? What happened?
L: I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law.
LM（惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情）:See! I have already told you when you are marrying that terrible Johnny, I told you that he is stupid and poor, but you did not listen to me.剧院的英文 Look at yourlf……
L: But, mum……
LM: Never interrupt me!
L: Mum, I’m not interrupting you. I just want to tell you that you are always right OK? And I’ll marry whom ever you want me to.
LM（大喜）:Nice girl! Just now, I met the mayor’s son in the market. He said: “If your daughter hasn’t been married, I really really want to marry her!” Now you are free again, I’ll go and tell him.（下）
L（惊愕）: cryptologyWhat? The mayor’s son? The most famous play boy in the neighbor-hood? （手中的锅铲掉在地上）What a silly thing I have done!（下）
Act3 旁白：Early this morning, Johnny gets up quite late, becau no one call to wake him up. The room is very quiet, as if what's missing.
（J睡眼惺忪上）
J（边走边道）:Lunch! Lunch! Where are my socks?
（走了几步,在地上捡起袜子）Here they are!（闻一下） Er! How smelly! They are still dirty!
（突然想起）Lunch has gone! I have to wash them mylf.
（摸摸肚子，《灰色空间》响起）Oh, I’m so hungry! But there’s no breakfast! （捡起地上的围裙）This is what Lunch always wears! I miss her so much, and her excellent cooking skill! Now she has gone. I have to cook for my mother and mylf.（停）
JM（上）: Where’s my breakfast? Where’s Lunch? Hasn’t she got up yet?
J: Mum,you and i lady gaga can’t you remember? Lunch has gone!
JM（沉吟片刻）:Well, to tell you the truth Johnny, a son without a wife is uless. Lunch is a nice girl, go and take her back!
J（立正敬礼）:Yes madam!
Act4
旁白：Hence, Johnny decides to take Lunch home. He happily walk on the road, the sun is shining, the birds are singing. All of a sudden a strong wind starts to blow, three brutish matchless robbers appeared. （J开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗）（《我不入地狱》响起）
A: Hey you! zophoneStop and listen to us!
