Pick a card.
All right. Now,memorize it.
-You got it? -Oh, yes.
Is that your card?
Yes.
-Hey,guys. -Hi there!
Guess what. Ben is gonna be in a TV commercial.
What are you talking about?
It's not for
...we met this guy in the park who thought Ben was cute.
You know,which he is. He gave us
...and told us to bring him for this commercial he's auditioning.
This guy's the biggest commercial casting director in town!
Ben takes one lousy walk in the park and gets an audition?
I mean, way to go, Ben!
I've been in that park a million times and no one's offered me an audition.
It's crazy. We were pushing Ben on the swings
I'm always on the swings!
What am I doing wrong?
That.
The One Where Rachel Smokes
23
Since you work at Ralph Lauren, can you get me some shirts?
I don't know if I'd feel comfortable stealing on my very first day.
Unwilling to steal from work.
Interesting.
If anybody gets free stuff, it's me.
Okay,guys,way to wish me luck.
Go get 'em!
Let's discuss Rachel's birthday.
I say we throw a surpri party this weekend.
But her birthday's not for another month.
If we throw her party on her birthday, it's not a surpri.
Great! We can have a dinner party and just invite her clo friends.
Ross! We're having a surpri party for Rachel.
Done.
Great. Wanna do it together?
I'd love to do it together!
They're gonna do it together.
That's my girlfriend.
So I gotta shut it down now?
I gotta go. I'm picking
...and then we're off to the big audition.
It's gonna be weird eing some actor pretending to be Ben's dad.
Weirder than eing his two moms make out?
Dad? There's a dad in the commercial?
Yeah. The dad and Ben eat soup and pretend to enjoy it.
Maybe I'll go with you and audition as the dad.
Who better to play Ben's father than his godfather?
-You're not his godfather. -What?
Are you kidding?
Of cour I am.
-Okay, let's go, godfather. -All right!
They're gonna let me audition!
Really? That's great!
One of the casting ladies has actually en me in a play.
So I steered clear of her.
And the other one,I
Well,you know.
-That kid looks familiar. -Oh,yeah.
He's done tons of commercials. I've en him in Sugar Smacks,
...and that one for the phone company.
He was so good,he convinced me to switch phone companies.
Chandler was mad.
He's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid.
I mean, look at him.
That's great.
Wouldn't it be great if I got to play Ben's dad?
You look nothing like Ben.
I look more like him than you do.
I really don't know you well enough for you to do that.
So it's down to the two. Nancy,I know you like this one.
I think I agree. Rachel,what do you think?
Well, that one
...but I just love this fabric.
Sorry.
Don't be. Part of your job is to give your opinions.
Then I take credit for them. I'm kidding!
She is kidding. But don't ever disagree with her again.
Okay,now I'm kidding!
What a fun office.
I don't know which one. But I do know I need a cigarette.
Let's take a break, go outside and sort this out when we return.
-You smoke? -No.
My dad's a doctor. And he would always tell me
About ghosts
...who totally supported the princess' right to smoke.
And then they came back from smoking and they'd made all of the decisions.
-That's not fair. -I know.
It's like I'm being punished for not having this disgusting, poisonous habit.
Yeah, it is the best.
What if this keeps happening?
They'll be smoking, making
...and I'll be up in my office breathing in my stupid clean air.
And when Kim wants to promote one
...who do you think she'll pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
We ud to have a smoking area at work.
It was great. There was this big flowerpot with dirt in it.
We ud to put our cigarettes out in it.
One of the old-timers told me there ud to be a little tree in there.
You can go down there and not smoke. Say you want some fresh air.
I could do that.
Or you could do the easy thing and smoke.
You gotta take long, deep drags.
Wow,I still don't have my lung capacity back yet.
Rach, do you wanna go get coffee?
-I would love to. -Oh,good.
I'm gonna go too.
Oh,good.
Oh,I changed my mind.
Let's talk about the party. I have so many ideas.
