2022年12月27日发(作者：姜澄宇)Wow! Bummer, dude.
靠 太倒霉了吧 兄台
You have a time machine?
你有台时光机
And somehow, it got programmed to this crap diner?
却把自己传送到这间破烂餐厅
I must admit, I am quite taken with steampunk.
我承认 我是挺迷蒸汽朋克的
对工业革命早期科技着迷 并虚构出蒸汽力至上的世界
蒸汽朋克: 上世纪80-90年代初的科幻题材
Oh, steampunk, right. I remember that trend.
蒸汽朋克啊 我记得啊
It happened for, like, ten conds
那玩意儿在2000年的
back in 2000 and-are-you-kidding-me?
"你当我白痴啊"时代流行过十秒钟
Dude, riously, you're sitting in a public place
兄台 说真的 坐在公共场合里
tap-tap-tapping on an oldie typewriter?
在老式打字机上敲敲打打
What are you?
你以为你谁啊
In the league of extraordinarily pretentious gentlemen?
超装逼联盟的参赛选手吗
Aren't you being a little aggressive?
你说话有点太咄咄逼人了吧
Yup.
没错
That's how people are here in the prent where we live.
我们未来世界的人都这么说话
But don't get me wrong.
你别误会我
I'd like to go back in time, too.
我也想要穿梭时空呢
Maybe stop 9/11 or that creep who had x on my shoe,
去阻止911或那乱"射"在我鞋上的变态
but I can't.
可我没办法啊
Prent? Where's that uniform from?
什么未来世界啊 瞧你那身制服
From like, 1998?
1998年买的吗
Oh, stop, or I'm going to have
再乱说
to shoot you with a Smith & Wesson
史密斯威森: 1855年建立的手枪军械制造商 我就要用的威森的枪崩了你啦
以制作左轮手枪闻名
I'm currently packing in my bloomers.
灯笼裤在1850年初开始广为流传 枪就藏在我的灯笼裤里哦
I'll go get thee a menu, my good man.
吾去给汝拿份菜单吧
仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为
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■ 本字幕由YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作
第23-24集 姐妹花 第一季 打工 第一季 打工 姐妹花 第23-24集
h翻译 死命狂哭YY猫
h翻译 死命狂哭YY猫
h翻译 用命翻译赛太公
h翻译 用命翻译赛太公
后期 鱼骨头h
后期 鱼骨头h
时间轴 总监 死命狂哭YY猫h 时间轴 总监 死命狂哭YY猫h
Attention, everyone.
大伙们 听我说一下
Max and I have a little late-night treat for you.
我跟麦克斯有深夜小礼物要给你们
Don't say it all excited like that.
别用这种兴奋的语气说好吗
Now when it's not drugs, Earl's going to be pisd.
你又不是给毒品 厄尔会失望得发火的
You are invited to a very important taste-test
你被邀请参加万分重要的
of Max's homemade cupcakes.
麦克斯自制小蛋糕品尝会
Okay, but I will have only one.
好的 不过我只吃一个哦
When I get a tummy, single ladies call me Buddha
我一旦有了小肚腩 单身女郎会叫我弥勒
佛
and rub me for luck.
然后摸我肚皮求好运
I gotta watch out, too.
我也得小心
Last time I had Max's chocolate espresso cupcake
上次我回家前 吃了一个麦克斯的
just before going home,
黑咖啡小蛋糕
I was awake till 5:00 A.M.,
到早上5点都睡不着
hand washing all my thongs.
手洗了一夜的丁字裤
Thongs? Earl, you devil.
丁字裤啊 你个小坏蛋
That's right, just becau there's snow on the roof
别看我头顶花白 白发胜雪
doesn't mean there's not swing in the sling.
裤裆里还是龙精虎猛 翻江倒海呢
Oh, Caroline, darling. Can you go back over there?
卡洛琳 亲爱的 你能去我座位
I forgot my racing form.
帮我拿赛马报吗
Oh, hor racing? It reminds me of Chestnut.
赛马啊 害我好想念栗宝
Max... Chestnut.
麦克斯 小栗宝
What's with the sad face?
你装个屁哭脸啊
Your hor is living it up at a fancy stable nearby.
你的马就住在附近的豪华马厩
Not gone to the great stud farm in the sky.
又不是住在天国的种马场
Did someone say "stud farm"?
有人提到"种马场"吗
My fee is $10 a quart or $15 if you want a boy.
我的精每0.9升10块 包生男的15块
Wow.
不错啊
You bounced back from your Sophie breakup pretty quick.
跟苏菲分手的情伤复原的挺快嘛
It was not a real breakup.
我们不是真分手
I will have her very soon again.
她很快又会回到我身边
Right now, I lay low and wait in bushes
现阶段 我就淡定的躲在草丛
like determined jungle cat.
如同盯上猎物的猎豹
Or a rapist.
是盯上猎物的强奸犯吧
Racing forms, here you go.
给 赛马报
Earl, maybe some time
厄尔 找机会
you will take me out to the track with you.
你也带我去马场吧
I ud to ride hors all the time in Korea.
我以前在韩国时 常常骑马呢
The mechanical ones for a quarter
是超市外那种一次一硬币的
in front of supermarkets?
电动小马吗
Actually, Max, I'm a very good rider.
麦克斯 我可是很厉害的骑师
In fact, I was training to be a jockey
我受过赛马骑师的训练呢
but was too short.
可惜我身高不够高
通常只选身高矮小的男子
矮到当不了骑师吗 赛马骑师对身高要求严格
Too short to be a jockey?
That's a hard hit, my man.
这也太悲催了吧 阿憨
Han, I had no idea you loved hors, too.
阿憨 真没想到你也爱马
Why didn't you ever say anything?
怎么都没听你提过啊
Well, why didn't you ever ask about any of my interests?
那你怎么不问问我有什么兴趣呢
I'll tell you why.
我来告诉你原因
Becau all you ever talk about is
因为你开口闭口永远都是
"our cupcake business, our cupcake business."
我们的小蛋糕生意如何如何
Doesn't your CD have other tracks?
你这张光盘就没别的曲子了吗
Anyway, our cupcake business
话说 我们的小蛋糕生意
has a very important meeti
ng tomorrow
明天有场十分重要的会面呢
with Paul Platt, the party planner.
要去见派对大师 保罗·普拉特
I know a party planner, too.
我也认识个派对大师
He lls . and Salma Hayek pinatas
他在墨西哥独立日时
off back of truck for Cinco de Mayo.
会在街上卖明星头像的彩陶罐
萨尔玛·海耶克 性感大胸女星
Awesome. Put me down for a Hayek.
我要一个海耶克头像的罐子
More storage space for candy.
有额外空间 装糖方便
Well, our party planner is the it guy in Manhattan.
我们要见的可是曼哈顿的大红人
And tomorrow, Max and I are doing
明天我要跟麦克斯带小蛋糕
a tasting for him at his office.
去他办公室给他品尝
How can someone be too short to be a jockey?
怎么有人能矮到不能当马师啊
Isn't that the whole point?
马师不就得是矮子吗
Are you all right, Max?
麦克斯 你没事吧
I got here as fast as I could.
我尽快赶来了
Caroline texted me to hurry over
卡洛琳发短信叫我快来
becau you didn't know you were pregnant,
说你不知道自己怀孕
and you were giving birth over toilet.
还准备要在厕所生孩子
So I grabbed my plunger and ran!
我抓着马桶吸就冲来了
That is insane. I never texted that.
太夸张了吧 我没发过这短信啊
No, I did, when I stole your phone.
是我偷用你手机发的
I needed a reason to get Sophie over here.
我要拐苏菲过来得有理由嘛
I can't believe she believed it.
我不敢相信她会信你的屁话
Oh, come on, Max. Giving birth over toilet?
麦克斯 在厕所里生娃
That is very you.
很像你会干的事嘛
Now that you are here, Sophie, sit.
苏菲 既然你都来了 坐吧
I want to tell you something important.
我想跟你说一件重要的事
Well, you can forget that.
你就算了吧
There's no way I'm going to stay.
我才不会留下来呢
A cupcake party?
有小蛋糕派对啊
Oh, look, and this one even has a pretzel in it.
这一个上面还有椒盐卷饼呢
Yup, that's our "salty n' spice"
那是我们的"咸配香料"口味
for our more adventurous customers.
给喜爱新奇口味的顾客
Also for the uptight white people,
而保守的白人顾客呢
we have the very, very vanilla
我们也做了传统的香草口味
which is... big surpri... my favorite.
也毫无意外的... 是我最爱的口味
And this is our beer-batter maple bacon
这是酒混面粉加枫蜜培根的
spring break cupcake.
特制春假小蛋糕
That's for stoners, and big surpri, my favorite.
给瘾君子的 比如我的最爱啦
We can only take four flavors
我们只能选四个口味
to reprent our cupcake business.
带去代表我们的小蛋糕店
See? Not one word ever about anyone el.
你看 说话从来都只提自己的事
I have a pet ferret, if anyone gives a damn.
有人在乎我其实有养只小雪貂吗
Well, I have some big news
我也
有大消息
I want to share with you all as well.
想要跟在座的各位分享
Sophie, that classy lady right over there...
苏菲 也就是坐在那里的高贵仕女
Mm, I like this one.
我喜欢这个口味
She recently broke it off with me
她不久前刚与我分手
becau she wanted to be with a man
理由是 她想跟一个有梦想
who had a dream and a drive.
有追求的男人在一起
So I have bought a drive...
所以我买了台"追求"
A Lincoln town car.
一台林肯豪华加长轿车
Yes, I have a new car rvice and slogan:
没错 我现在当司机还有新标语
"lie back and I will ride you till you tell me to stop."
"放松坐好 你不喊停 我绝不停下"
So, Oleg, you now have a town car business?
奥列格 所以你现在要当轿车司机
And Sophie, you rent town cars all the time.
而苏菲 你总是租加长轿车
Oh, oh, plea.
那又如何
I mean, I love pizza, too, but that doesn't mean
我也喜欢吃炸鸡 难道我还得嫁给
I have to marry PaPa John.
肯德基爷爷吗
I was just thinking, you might want to come out back
我刚在想 你可能会对我车上那面
and take a look at the light-up makeup mirror on visors.
会发亮的化妆镜有兴趣呢
Light-up makeup mirror?
会发亮的化妆镜
Oh, I might be interested.
感觉挺有意思啊
But not just you and I.
不过我不要单独跟你去
Han will come as well.
阿憨也一起来吧
Finally! Han is getting invited to something.
终于啊 有人邀请阿憨一起去玩
Other than LinkedIn.
别人只邀我加入网站过
So much for the taste test. It's fine.
品尝会估计也告一段落了 不过没事
I know what's best for our cupcake business.
我知道怎么做对我们的小蛋糕生意最有利
I do say that a lot,
我的确是很常提到呢
but I think it's kind of charming.
不过听着舒服 我喜欢
I'll go get our coats.
我去拿我们的外套吧
Mm, mm, mm. Look at you.
你看你
I must say, I'm impresd with how far you've come.
我必须得说 你进步非常大啊
Well, you burn a few thousand cupcakes,
烤坏了几千个小蛋糕
you're bound to get better.
总会上手的
Not just the cupcakes, Max.
不只是烤蛋糕技术啊 麦克斯
Look how far you've come.
你人也进步了许多
When I think of that girl who came in here
想当年 你只是个打工混日子
just looking to get by...
能过一天是一天的人
Hey, and check you out now.
瞧你现在
Big, fancy meeting in Manhattan. Lordy lord!
要去曼哈顿跟大人物面谈了 厉害啊
- It's only a meeting, Earl. - Maybe.
-厄尔 只是小面谈啦 -或许吧
But if you were one of the hors,
可如果你是一匹赛马
I'd put all of my money on you, Max.
我愿把毕生积蓄压在你身上呢
Paul Platt parties. Plea hold.
保罗·普拉特派对公司 请稍等
Poor kid.
可怜的娃啊
If I had that job, I'd be asking someone
如果我是
他 我就会对人说
to plea hold a gun to my head.
请拿枪毙了我吧
He's probably excited to be working for Paul Platt.
能为保罗·普拉特工作 他一定很兴奋
Look at all the magazines
看看这些杂志
经过多年苦心经营 成为美国第二富婆
都称他是下一代的玛莎·斯图尔特 玛莎·斯图尔特 美国家政女皇 出身微寒
calling him the next Martha Stewart.
Someday, we'll have articles about us.
有一天 杂志也会有我们的专题的
You know, pictures of you and me
还配上我们俩站在
standing outside our country home.
我们别墅外的照片
Hold on.
等等
We're rich and still living together?
我们有钱后还得一起住啊
Okay, she's leaving. This is us.
好了 她要走了 轮到我们了
About time.
是该到我们了
Been sitting here so long my ass is asleep,
坐等好久 我屁股都睡着了
which kind of goes against my theory that it won't quit.
但我是不会夹着屁股逃跑的
Hi, Paul's going to be a little longer.
保罗还有点事 请稍等
It's fine. It's just how much...
没关系 不过还...
Paul Platt parties, plea hold.
保罗·普拉特派对公司 请稍等
- Paul Platt parties... - How much longer...
-保罗·普拉特派对公司 -还得等...
- Plea hold. - Me or them?
-请稍等 -我们还是他们
I got the ass pins and needles.
坐得我屁乱如麻啊
- Max. - What? We're on hold.
-麦克斯 -干嘛 反正没轮到我们
Have a at. Five more minutes.
请坐吧 再稍等五分钟
Paul Platt parties.
保罗·普拉特派对公司
The word "Party" at a party planner's?
派对公司墙上挂写着派对的画
Little obvious.
脱裤子放屁嘛
Like me having art that says "will die alone."
跟我挂一幅"孤独终老"一样多余
Wait.
等等
I think this is Johnny's art. No way.
不会吧 这是强尼画的
"No way" is right. Johnny's a nobody.
当然不会 强尼只是小角色
Paul Platt wouldn't have a framed "Johnny" in his office.
保罗·普拉特才不屑挂强尼的画呢
Look, signed "Jpeg." That's his tag.
你看这签名 写着电子图档哥呢
Yo, what's the deal with this art?
这画谁画的啊
It's a street artist.
一个街头艺术家
Everyone's getting really into him now.
最近还挺火热的
Oh, yeah?
是吗
He was trying to get into me a few months ago.
几个月前他也想跟我"搞"得火热呢
It was more emotional than that.
其实是有故事的啦
He cheated on his girlfriend with her
他搞外遇来找她
and then blew her off.
后来又把她甩了
It was really hard for us.
这事情还挺打击我们的
And you thought me slapping my ass
靠 你刚还说我拍屁股不适当
in front of him was inappropriate?
说这些话就适当啊
- Wow, Johnny made it. - Well, good for him.
-强尼成功啦 -恭喜他
He's making it, we're making it...
他功成名就 我们也快了
We're making it?
我们快成
功个屁
I magic-markered over the scuffs on my boot,
我还得用油性笔给我的靴子补色
and we can't even get past
而且我们连穷人版
约翰·库萨克这一关都过不去 约翰·库萨克: 美国知名男演员
the poor man's John Cusack over there.
Max, we are making it.
麦克斯 我们成功在望
We've come a long way.
我们度过了这么多难关
We haven't ud Starbucks napkins
我们都没用星巴克餐巾纸
for toilet paper in months.
当厕纸好久了
And now, look where we are.
你看 我们一直在往上爬嘛
We've got a meeting with Paul Platt.
到现在 居然能有机会见保罗·普拉特
Say it, "we're making it."
你得说出口 "我们成功在望"
I'm rious. Say it, Max.
我是认真的 你得说出口
We are making it.
我们成功在望
Okay, we're making it.
好啦 我们成功在望
- Caroline channing. - This is us!
-卡洛琳·钱宁 -到我们了
- Ahh. - What, five more minutes?
-这个嘛... -又怎么了 再等五分钟吗
Monday at 4:00. Something came up.
突然有要事 改约周一下午4点了
Oh, okay. Well, Monday at 4:00.
好吧 周一下午4点
There's no Monday at 4:00.
没这回事的对吧
He said Monday at 4:00. Monday at 4:00, right?
他说周一下午4点 没骗人吧
Absolutely. Monday at 4:00.
当然没有 周一下午4点见
There is no Monday at 4:00.
其实他没要见你们
I'm confud. Is there a Monday at 4:00?
我有点糊涂了 是有要见面吗
In the books, Monday at 4:00. Paul can't wait.
记录着呢 周一下午4点 保罗等不及了
There is no Monday at 4:00.
他压根没有要见你们
I don't understand. Are we coming in Monday at 4:00?
我搞糊涂了 我们是来还是不来啊
Absolutely. Paul's a big fan.
当然来啊 保罗很喜欢你们
Don't come in on Monday.
周一别来了
Can you plea tell me what's going on?
你能解释一下到底怎么了吗
See, it's this news about your father being moved
最近新闻在报导你老爸被转移到
to a cushy white collar prison this week.
舒坦的高智慧罪犯监狱
Paul can't have anything to do with someone named Channing,
保罗不敢跟叫"钱宁"的人扯上关系
'cau everyone in New York is pisd.
毕竟全市都在不爽"钱宁"呢
Look at all that. It never stops.
你看 我的过去阴魂不散
How much more of this do I have to take?
我还得再受多少折磨啊
So we'll e you on Monday!
所以我们周一见吧
Don't come.
别来了
I woke my ass up for this?
靠 早知道不叫我屁股起床了
Mmm. This was delicious, Max.
麦克斯 小蛋糕太好吃了
Here's a $20. Keep the change.
给你20块吧 不用找钱了
What are you doing, Sophie?
苏菲 你这是干嘛
You don't pay for the cupcakes.
我不可能收你小蛋糕钱的
No, take it for your business.
为了生意而收下吧
Ever since your big party planner meeting went bust,
你们跟派对大师的面谈
失败后
I was worried that you two girls
我就一直很担心你们
might form a joint suicide pact.
会办一个自杀姐妹会
Nah, we're not that organized.
我们才没有这么强大的组织力
So how's Caroline today?
卡洛琳心情如何
She's handling it all better than I thought.
比我想象中的好多了
She's with her father's lawyer right now,
她去见她爸爸的代表律师了
trying to figure out the best time for her
想趁她老爸移监前
to go out to the prison to e him before he's moved.
找出一个好时机去探访他
Oh, that is my new phone.
是我的新手机
You know there's a phone stuck to that gay Furby, right?
你的基佬娃娃上还粘了支手机呢
Yes, this is from my favorite store on 14th street,
这是我去14街上 我最爱的店买来的呢
Rhinestoned.
店名叫"人造钻石"
Oh, it's just a text from my driver.
是我司机发来的短信
He's waiting out front.
他在楼下等了
Why don't you just invite Oleg inside?
直接叫奥列格上来不就好了吗
I'm not sure yet he derves to come inside.
我还不确定他是否够格进来
Well, from what I heard, he's already come inside.
据我所知 他不是早够格"进入"了吗
Oh, Max, I love it when you're dirty!
麦克斯 我就爱听你说荤段子
Hey, how'd it go?
怎么样了
Well, according to my father's lawyer,
根据我父亲的律师所说
the prison is surrounded by so much press
监狱被太多媒体包围
that daddy doesn't want me to come out there
老爸不想我出来抛头露面
and be exploited all over again.
被媒体再度生吞活剥
Why is he still the only news story out there?
为啥就没有其他大新闻了啊
Well, the good news is,
别气 好歹今天
your hair is especially shiny today.
你的头发超闪闪动人啊
It is? Thanks, Sophie.
真的吗 谢了 苏菲
So try not to kill yourlf.
听完就别想着自杀了哦
Well, if I didn't kill mylf reading the in the car,
我在车上读这些信时 都没跑去死
I won't.
现在也不会了
Hate mail.
怒骂信
It was being held at my old P.O. Box.
这些全都寄到了我以前的邮箱
My father's lawyer picked it up for me.
我父亲的律师帮我收的信
Why didn't he just punch you in the face and call it a day?
他何不直接扁你一拳就算了
I know, it's like the end of Miracle on 34th street,
对啊 这跟《34街的奇迹》的结局差不多
only everyone's calling me a bitch.
差别只是 大家都叫我贱货
Oh, come on, not everyone is calling you a bitch.
也不是大家都骂你贱货的吧
"Dear bitch, I hate you."
"贱货你好 我恨你"
"If I ever e you on the street, I will..."
"哪天让我在街上见到你 我一定...
shake your hand and wish you well,
会跟你握手 然后祝福你平安
as you have been through so very much.
希望你能雨过天晴"
That is not what that says.
信上才不是这么写呢
It might b
Come on, all you need is a big, glamorous party.
你不就需要一个大派对让你崭露头角嘛
I mean, look at all the celebrities that are on the list
你看邀请名单上的名流
Martha Stewart,
玛莎·斯图尔特
Justin Timberlake...
贾斯丁·汀布莱克
Ooh, Hugh Jackman!
休·杰克曼
Oh, I like to call him "Huge" Jackman,
我都喜欢叫他巨根·杰克曼
becau I bet he has a big penis.
因为我猜他一定有"巨根"
Wall me.
夹爆我吧
Thank you, sir.
谢谢啦
Welcome home, buddy.
欢迎回家啊 栗宝
As you can e, we haven't put the pool in yet.
如你所见到的 我们还没弄好泳池
We'll get to it.
会弄的
Tree, grill, shovel... usual cast of characters.
树 烤炉 铲子 你的老朋友们都在
Now, I am going to take you in to her,
我现在就带你去见她吧
but I should warn you.
不过我先警告你
She hasn't been out of bed for two days,
她两天没下床了
and that means no tooth brushing and it's bad up in there.
她那两天没刷过牙的嘴 口气很惊人的
I'm pretty sure hors have a keen n of smell,
我猜你们马的嗅觉应该很好
so just be prepared.
所以你小心点吧
I misd you, too.
我也很想你啊 栗宝
Max, I'm trying to sleep. Take your boots off.
麦克斯 我在睡觉呢 脱鞋好吗
Caroline, I have something for you.
卡洛琳 我有东西要给你看哦
Go away. I'm dead.
此人已死 有事烧纸
Jeez, and you said my breath was bad.
天啊 你以前还嫌我嘴臭
You have a visitor, someone you love.
你有个访客哦 你很爱他呢
Chestnut! Chestnut, hi, baby, hi.
栗宝 栗宝 宝贝你来啦
How did he get here?
他怎么来的
I went to Peach and told her
我去找了琵琪 跟她说
it was a matter of life and death
人命关天
and we had to have him back.
不得不把栗宝带回来
And what, she just gave him back to you?
她就这么让你把他带走啊
Well, I did have to agree to come back and babysit
我还得同意我这一生每周都得去
one day a week for the rest of my life,
照看她的小孩一天
but hell, Chestnut's home.
随便啦 反正栗宝回来啦
Max, thank you so much. You brought me back to life.
麦克斯 谢谢你 你让我重获新生
Oh, my God, don't exhale on me.
求你了 别对我吐气好吗
Your breath is like you went down on a brusls sprout.
你的口气跟吃过大便似地
Tip your head that way.
把你的头转走
Chestnut, Chestnut.
栗宝 栗宝
Don't breathe on him either!
也别对他吐气好吗
His whole head is a no. He can't handle that.
他的鼻子占了头大半 你想熏死他啊
Chestnut's home.
栗宝回家啦
Han, I'm so excited.
阿憨 我好开心啊
Did you hear my hor is back?
听说我栗宝回家的事了吗
This is not conversation.
你这不是找我聊天
This is just the other thing you say.
你只是在对我宣布事情
"My cupcake business, my hor,
"我的小蛋糕生意 我的马
my hor, my cupcake business."
我的马 我的小蛋糕生意"
Well, in ca anyone's interested,
给在场的有心人
my ferret's name is Alvin.
我的雪貂名字叫艾文
And Alvin's telling his friends
艾文也告诉他的朋友
he has a pet named han.
他有只宠物叫阿憨
Hey, Earl. Long time, no e.
厄尔 好久不见啊
Well, well, well, Johnny.
哎哟 是强尼啊
If it isn't the famous street artist.
传说中的那位街头画家
Well, I'm hardly famous.
也没到传说中啦
You got that right.
没错
My remark was laced with sarcasm.
我单纯是想讽刺你
Can you tell Max I'm here?
能告诉麦克斯我来了吗
That depends. Are you still a two-timing bum?
那得看了 你还在踏两船吗
That's his name,
他就叫踏两船
don't wear it out.
别多叫 叫多了不好
Hiya, slugger.
好久不见啊 小猛女
Can you do me a favor and call Earl off?
能帮我让厄尔消停消停吗
I may be on day six of my p90x,
虽然我也勤于锻炼
but I'm in no shape to take on a heavyweight like him.
但我是打不过他这种强大选手的
It's okay, Earl, we're cool.
没事了 厄尔
Well, I am. He's just riding my fumes.
他在姐身后吃尘呢
So, uh, where's your ction?
你管哪区呢
- Counter. - Hm, same ol哈顿 -曼哈顿啊
That hardly calls for a good-bye speech.
搬去那里还道个什么别啊
It's over there.
都没多远
Yeah, I know, but it's a big change for me,
但搬过去就是两个世界了
and we're not going to be rolling
我们将不再是
in the same circles anymore,
一个圈子的人
and I'm getting married... over there.
我也要去结婚了
Well, at least you and your girlfriend worked it out.
起码你跟你那女朋友修成正果了
Actually, we broke up.
其实我们分手了
This is someone I met a couple months ago.
我是要跟几个月前认识的另一个女人结婚
I was only watching his lips,
我刚只读他的唇了
but did they just say what I think they said?
但他刚才说的话我没看错吧
Well, there's your cupcake. That'll be $5.
给 你要的小蛋糕 5块钱
The price has gone up. Yeah, we're successful now.
没错 涨价了 我们现在也是成功人士了
In fact, we may be working with Martha Stewart.
我们可能要跟家政女皇合作了呢
Caroline knows her from, you know, before.
卡洛琳以前跟她有些关系
We're gonna talk it over with her
我们会再跟她谈
at the met gala ball that Caroline got invited to.
我们有被邀请去博物馆的年度晚会
Martha's on the committee. Caroline goes every year.
玛莎是委员会的人 而卡洛琳也年年出席
Not a big deal.
小事一桩啦
My first time. Not a big deal either.
虽然我是第一次 不过也没啥啦
In fact, none of it's a big deal,
说实在的 全都没什么嘛
just two girls who are making it
不过就是两个功成名就的姑娘
but who choo to stay in Brooklyn 'cau we're cool.
因为个性帅气所以留在布鲁克林奋斗嘛
That's awesome, Max. That's awesome.
恭喜你啊 麦克斯 真心恭喜
It's just funny, becau whenever I think of you,
你知道吗 每当我想起你时
I think of you in this diner in that uniform.
总是浮现你在这餐厅穿着制服的画面
In a good way.
不是贬低你哦
You want money now?
你要收钱吗
Yeah. It's business.
是啊 在商言商
It's not like we had a relationship or anything.
我们又没有在一起还什么的
In fact, you can pay Caroline.
其实你还是付给卡洛琳吧
She's the money. I'm the artist.
她管账 我管创作
You know, I'm doing pretty well as an artist mylf.
我的创作生涯最近也挺一帆风顺呢
I've been lling a lot of my stuff.
卖了不少我的作品
Really? We hadn't heard.
是吗 没听说过
And there's your cupcake.
你点的小蛋糕
In ca you didn't notice, that container's to go.
放在"外带"盒子里了 懂意思吧
Got it.
懂了
He's gone. I got rid of him.
他走了 我把他撵走了
Max?
麦克斯
What are you doing?
你在干嘛呢
Punching cheecakes.
捶起司蛋糕
It's my version of going to bed for two days.
你不爽就睡两天 我不爽就捶两个
Are you more upt about the
marriage thing or the uniform thing?
你比较气婚事还是气制服的事啊
Oh, this isn't about Johnny. I'm mad at the cheecakes.
跟他无关 我就气这些起司蛋糕
They were suppod to have cherries on top,
不是应该有樱桃在上面的吗
and I wanted cherries!
我要樱桃啊
Why not me?
为什么不是我
Okay, maybe it's half no cherries, half Johnny.
好吧 一半是气樱桃 一半气强尼
Nothing ever does work out for us.
我们从没一帆风顺过
And then I hear mylf saying all that ridiculous stuff
然后听到自己瞎扯的那些
about us talking to Martha Stewart at the gala.
跟家政女皇合作的事情
I mean, what was that? It's insane.
那简直就是痴人说梦嘛
Is it?
是吗
Wait, riously, is it?
说真的 真是痴人说梦吗
Or is it just insane enough to be genius?
还是那其实是大智若愚呢
Max, we have the invitation. She'll be there.
麦克斯 我们有邀请函 她又会在场
Why are we wasting our time with Paul Platt
我们干嘛浪费时间找保罗啊
when we can meet the real thing?
玛莎才是真正的风云人物
We can take Martha our best cupcake,
带我们最好吃的小蛋糕给玛莎
explain our situation,
解释我们的情况
and maybe... maybe she'll talk to us.
说不定她会愿意给我们个机会
I mean, she was a girl with a dream once, too,
她也是一步一步爬上来的嘛
and she certainly understands hard times.
想必她能了解谷底奋战的心情
You are talking about us stalking Martha Stewart.
是要我们去跟踪玛莎·斯图尔特吗
I am talking about us stalking Martha Stewart!
没错 就是这样
I even have my gorgeous Judith leiber jeweled cupcake pur
我还有个小蛋糕造型的名牌包包
to smuggle the cupcake in. It's perfect.
来偷带小蛋糕进去 简直是天造地设啊
I knew there was a reason I took that from the townhou.
把那个包偷出来果然是冥冥中的安排啊
Great, you have a cupcake and a cupcake pur.
太好了 我们有蛋糕跟蛋糕包
What el are we gonna wear to the ball, Cinderella?
那我们该穿什么去舞会呢 灰姑娘
Are the rats in the alley gonna whip us up some ball gowns?
难道防火巷里的老鼠会帮我们织礼服吗
I mean, it's not exactly like we have a fairy godmother.
我们又没有个神仙教母
Hey, look, girls!
女孩们
I got mylf a crown and a wand at Rhinestoned.
我在我最爱的店里买了皇冠跟魔棒呢
I'll have the soup in my booth.
把汤送来我的卡座吧
Well, this is as clo to a fairytale
反正这估计是我们这辈子
as you and I are ever gonna get, so what the hell?
最接近美梦成真的时刻了 那就做吧
Max, does that mean we're gonna find
麦克斯 你同意要想办法
a way to go to the ball?
混进舞会了吗
Oh, yeah. Get your cupcake on,
是啊 备妥小蛋糕吧
'cau we're gonna get balled.
要开始"混入舞会大作战"啦
Sophie, this is so generous of you
苏菲 感谢你慷慨解囊
to offer to buy us dress for the gala,
愿意帮我们买晚宴穿的裙子
but as much as my shoes love being back
不过尽管我的鞋子很开心
- in their place of birth... - Oh, your shoes were born here?
-回到故乡... -哇 你的鞋子是在这买的呀
Mine were born in China, but I adopted them at Payless.
我的是中国货 在鞋美价廉网上淘的
Maybe we should find something cheaper,
或许我们应该去寄卖店
at one of tho consignment stores.
淘两件便宜货
"Consignment stores"?
"寄卖店"
Come on, what are we, gypsies?
拜托 你当我们是游牧民族啊
This is big fancy ball. We need ball gowns.
这是个华丽的盛会 我们就得盛装打扮
Never really been a fan of balls.
我从来不喜欢参加舞会
In fact, always thought they got in the way,
老实说 我一直很讨厌舞会
but here we are.
可我们始终是来了
Well, we do have to look amazing
如果我们要带着小蛋糕
if we're approaching Martha Stewart with a cupcake,
接近玛莎·斯图尔特 就必须得打扮得美美的
so we'll find a way to pay you back
钱我们会想办法还你的
and start by doing some cleaning jobs for you for free.
不然先从免费帮你打扫房子开始好了
No!
不用
Every year I give money to charity,
我每年都捐钱给慈善机构
and I like you two girls way more than the babies
而且相比那些孩子阴暗的假笑
with the broken smiles.
我更喜欢你们俩姑娘
So don't worry. I got plenty of cash.
所以别担心 姐可是带足了钱
Aww, a roll of hundreds.
哇 一捆百元大钞
Reminds me of my Christmas stocking stuffers.
我以前圣诞袜也用这个填充
Yeah, this is fun day.
今天是有趣的一天
在《风月俏佳人》中扮演爱上妓女的钻石王老五
我就像理查·基尔 而你们俩是我的风月佳人 理查·基尔 美国著名男演员
I'm like Richard Gere and you're my two hookers.
Well, when you put it like that,
听你这么一说
I'm a little more comfortable.
我心里舒服多了
Good afternoon. How can I help you?
下午好 有什么需要帮忙的吗
Hi, how are you? We don't have a lot of time.
你好 我们赶时间
We have to be at work by 6:00.
下午6点就得上班
Can you show us your best formal spring couture?
麻烦把店里最好的春款晚礼服拿出来
Perhaps you ladies might be more comfortable
或许你们去普通成衣店
down in ready-to-wear.
比较合适吧
As I said, we're in a bit of a rush.
都说了我们赶时间
We might move a little quicker if you dropped the attitude
如果你能摆低姿态 快点把衣服拿出来
and picked up some dress.
我们就能快点甩钱走人
Show her your wad.
把你那捆大钞露出来
Let's look at some dress.
很高兴为你们服务
Yeah, and get us some champagne,
对了 要像电影那样
like in the movies.
给我们上点香槟哦
One, two...
一 二
Han, did you just go up on your tiptoes like a big boy?
阿憨 你刚是踮起脚尖 好让自己像个大孩子吗
Well, I wasn't expecting a photo opportunity.
我以为没机会跟你们合照
And I left my Tom Crui man-heels at home.
所以我把汤姆·克鲁斯爱穿的增高鞋扔家里了
Max, give him a break.
麦克斯 放过他吧
This is a man who was too short to be a jockey.
这男人矮的都当不上马师
Oleg, give me your camera.
奥列格 给我相机
I must approve picture.
我得审核照片
We've taken it three times already.
我们都拍了三次了
Han, if you want a nip slip, just ask.
阿憨 如果你想要奶子走光照 就直说
My dress is too pretty for this conversation,
我的衣服这么漂亮 不适合参与这种话题
so I'm gonna go get the cupcake from the refrigerator.
所以我还是去冰箱把蛋糕拿出来吧
And I'm going to warm up my new town car for the ladies.
那我先为姑娘们热一下我的加长新轿车
New?
新车
What is this, 2002?
如果现在是2002年 那就是新车
I hope so,
我倒希望
then I will have chance to meet you for first time all over again.
这样我就有机会重新认识你一次
Now this is not professional driver talk.
这可不是专职司机该讲的话
Hey, fancy ball Buster, what's your deal?
舞会仙女婆婆 你这是闹哪样
You told him to get a dream and a drive,
是你告诉他要有梦想和豪车
and he did.
现在他做到了
Max, I have two sore spots.
麦克斯 我有两个痛处
Trusting men and...
一个是相信男人
And here, where that crazy Jamaican
另一个是这里 那个牙买加疯子
wove my extensions too tight.
把我的头发接得太紧了
I'm thinking I should wait to put the cupcake
我在想等下车之后
in the cupcake pur till we get out of the car.
我再把小蛋糕放进小蛋糕包里
We want our beer batter maple bacon cupcake
我要用混酒面粉加枫蜜培根小蛋糕
to reprent our cupcake business.
作为我们小蛋糕业务的招牌
We have a new record.
她又刷新记录了
She cupcake four times in one speech.
一口气居然说了四次小蛋糕
We should go.
我们该走了
Upper East Side from Brooklyn at this time of day is crazy.
这个点从布鲁克林去上东区该堵死了
But we came in here to show Earl.
可我们来这是为了让厄尔看看
Maybe Earl decided not to come
可能厄尔觉得今晚休息
since he had the night off.
就不过来了吧
Max, we really should be there at the start.
麦克斯 我们必须在一开始就到场
That's prime Martha Stewart stalking time.
那是偷偷接近玛莎·斯图尔特的最佳时机
You're right. And Martha will probably
你说得对 玛莎很可能
have to leave early to get up to bake;
会需要提早离场 回家干活
A little something I knows about.
我熟知的那种"干活"
The only difference
between Martha and I
我和玛莎唯一的区别是
is she probably doesn't have to worry about
她无需担心会吵醒
waking up her roommate who lives four feet from the oven.
睡在烤箱四英尺之外的室友
But otherwi, twinsies!
除此之外 如出一辙
Hold up, hold up, hold up.
等等 等等
Earl, slow down, your heart.
厄尔 慢点 你有心脏病
Sorry I'm late, ladies.
抱歉来晚了 女士们
But if I run any faster, the cops tend to pull guns on me.
我再跑快一点 警察会以为我是在逃嫌犯呢
Got held up at the florist shop,
在花店耽搁了一会儿
but I made it. Here you go, ladies.
还好及时赶到 给 女士们
Aww, Earl, you got us flowers?
厄尔 你还专门给我们买花啊
Wrist corsages.
腕花
I hope they're still in style.
希望现在还流行这个
They're a classic, Earl.
经典永垂不朽 厄尔
Like you.
跟你一样
Mmm, that was worth the run.
这趟跑得值了
Let's go, ladies.
走吧 女士们
Oleg is waiting to drive you.
奥列格等着载你们驶向目的地
And you drive me crazy.
而你 载我驶向墓地
Yeah, yeah. Tell it to the marines.
是呀是呀 这话跟海军陆战队说去
Here, Earl, take my phone.
给 厄尔 帮我拿着手机
I can't fit it in the pur with my cupcake.
装了蛋糕 我的手包就装不下手机了
Have the best time in the world.
祝你玩得愉快
And say hello to "Huge" Jackman for me.
代我向"巨根"杰克曼问好
That is not a good sign.
这可不是好兆头
他笃信视大麻为圣餐的斯塔法教
这车喷出来的烟比 鲍勃·马利牙买加著名雷鬼英雄
That car is smoking harder than
Bob Marley on a rasta holiday.
鲍勃·马利在斯塔法教日喷得还狠
Sophie, if my cousin Yuri said he would be here
苏菲 如果我的表弟有利说
in half hour with parts to fix,
他会在半小时内带着工具来修车
he will be here in half hour.
他就一定会在半小时内到
Actually, it's been 40 minutes.
话说这都过了40分钟了吧
Your cousin is like you.
你的表弟就跟你一样
He takes too long to come.
死活不来[射]
Oh, this is news.
真新鲜
Suddenly a woman wants a man to finish fast.
女人突然开始喜欢男人早早完事了
Oh, plea.
拜托
Sex is not a carnival crui.
做爱又不是邮轮可以慢慢开
I'm a busy woman.
我很忙的
You get on, you get off.
前脚上船 后脚下船
Can I get a hit off that?
我能来一口吗
We'll just have to wait, I guess.
我猜就只能干等了
I mean, if I still lived in Manhattan, I'd hail a cab.
如果我还住在曼哈顿 我可以打个车
But that's not gonna happen out here in the boondocks!
但我们是在荒郊野岭 所以求助无门
Plus, even if we could afford a cab,
再说了 即使打得起车
we'd be stuck forever in rush hour gridlock.
我们也会被困在高峰时期无尽的堵车中
Could you take it down a notch?
你能小点声吗
Hipsters are starting to look at us
嬉皮士们都看过来了
like we're trying too hard.
好像我们入戏太深似的
Where did Han go?
阿憨去哪里了
He said he might have a plan.
他说他可能有办法
Oh, my lord and Taylor!
万能的主呀
That little mother can ride.
那小玩意儿居然会骑
You two look like two princess in a fairy tale.
你们俩就像童话里的两位公主
Are you feeling safe?
你怕不怕
I couldn't feel any safer
如果我们骑的是
if we were riding a rubber into town.
塑胶小马 我就不怕
Here we go. Bye, guys.
那我们走啦 再见 各位
- Bye. - Go, Chestnut!
-再见 -走把 栗宝
Oh, check it out. You e what I e?
快看 你也看见了吧
Hello, officers.
你好 警官大人
We're on way to the ball down the street,
我们在去舞会的路上
and we were wondering if we could plea leave
我们想问能不能请你们
our hor with your hors?
帮我看一下马
And I can save you the time
你们也不必浪费时间
on the breathalyzer test;
做酒精浓度测试
No, we are not drunk
我们没喝醉
or on some bachelorette party scavenger hunt.
也没在玩未婚女子派对的寻宝游戏
Our car broke down in Brooklyn,
我们的车在布鲁克林坏了
so we rode over the Brooklyn bridge and up.
我们是从布鲁克林大桥骑过来的
You rode a hor across the Brooklyn bridge?
你骑着马在布鲁克林大桥上跑啊
That's badass.
真是酷毙了
Yes... And illegal.
没错 同时也违法了
In that ca, we took the tunnel.
其实我们走的是隧道
Well, I think we can help you two ladies.
没问题 我们可以帮忙
Not gonna happen, Dave. We're on duty.
不可能 戴夫 我们在值班呢
Officers, we're already a little late.
警官大人 我们已经迟到了
And with all due respect, we don't have time
恕我直言 我们真没时间
to play good cop, bad cop.
玩好警察坏警察的游戏
Or in your cas, hot cop, hot cop.
不过你们俩是 帅警察超帅警察
Well, I think we can help you ladies.
没问题 我们可以帮忙
Let's get you down off of there.
先扶你们俩下来吧
I got the one in the low-cut.
裙子低胸那个我来扶
Thanks officer hot and officer hotter.
谢谢帅警官和超帅警官
You know I'm officer hotter, right?
你知道超帅警官说的是我吧
Oh, come on, man. Have you en me in my sunglass?
拜托 你见过哥戴墨镜的帅样吗
No contest.
赢你几条街
Max, I'm really impresd with how well
麦克斯 你穿着长裙
you're maneuvering around in that long skirt.
还能活动自如 真让我意外
Yeah, I was a rving wench at a medieval times restaurant.
我在中世纪餐馆工作时穿过女仆装
It's a breeze when I'm not carrying
不用端着装满
a tray loaded with Turkey legs and ale.
火鸡腿和啤酒的盘子 更让我身轻如燕
There's the "will call" Table.
预定
零售台在那里
Walk in front and I'll hide behind you,
你走前面 我躲在你后面
as I'm the most hated woman in New York.
因为我是全纽约最遭人恨的女人
So basically, I'm a human shield?
所以我是来当人肉盾牌的吗
Well, you have more up here to stop anything.
你上面比较"有料" 能抵挡一切
- Max! - What?
-麦克斯 -怎么了
Did someone pull a gun?
有人掏枪吗
I knew that was gonna happen.
我就知道会有状况发生
No, I screamed becau I saw the couple
不是 我尖叫是因为我看见
who sworn statement put my father in prison.
那对让我爸锒铛入狱的夫妇
Max!
麦克斯
Acid in your pretty face?
有人用硫酸泼你的小脸吗
Sorry, I stayed up all night reading
抱歉 我熬夜翻你的仇恨信
what people want to do to you in your hate mail.
看看人们想怎么把你千刀万剐
What was it?
又怎么了
I went down so fast, I may have smeared my cupcake.
我蹲地太快 可能会弄脏我的小蛋糕
That's the filthiest sounding clean thing I ever heard.
这是我听过最黄最"纯洁"的事了
It's fine. Good.
还好没事
Now let's go get tho cheap plastic curity bracelets
现在去拿两个会破坏我们华服整体美感的
that ruin our expensive gowns.
廉价塑料安检手环
- Can I get your name? - Caroline...
-能告诉我你的名字吗 -卡洛琳
Channing.
钱宁
I'm sorry, what?
抱歉 没听见
Caroline...
卡洛琳
Channing.
钱宁
What's with you? Just say your name.
你搞什么 快说名字
Channing.
钱宁
Did you say channing? Caroline channing?
你刚是说钱宁吗 卡洛琳·钱宁
Wait, are you that Caroline channing?
慢着 你是那个卡洛琳·钱宁吗
Shh, yes, and I personally called the R.S.V.P. Number.
对 我亲自打过电话问过主办方
It has to be there.
肯定有我的名字
Channing, channing, channing...
钱宁 钱宁 钱宁
No, I don't e "Caroline channing."
没 我没看见有"卡洛琳·钱宁"
Maybe it's under my name.
或许在我的名字下
Max black. I'm with her.
麦克斯·布莱克 我们是一起的
Black... no, no, no, I don't e any blacks here.
布莱克 没没没 我没看见任何叫布莱克[黑人]的
You mean besides the ones working curity?
你是说除了在场的黑人保安吗
Let me check with Paul Platt, the party planner.
我问下派对策划人保罗·普拉特吧
He's on the phone with him right now.
他的助手正在跟他通电话呢
- Hey, Brody. - Oh, no.
-布洛迪 -不是吧
There's a problem with the list.
名单有点问题
She's not on it. Her.
她不在名单上 就是她
Caroline channing.
卡洛琳·钱宁
Paul, I've got Caroline channing,
保罗 卡洛琳·钱宁来了
and she's not on the list.
可她不在名单上
If everybody in this line could just wait until
后面派对的各位麻烦等等
we get the Caroline channing situation under control...
我们要
处理下卡洛琳·钱宁突发状况
If you say "Channing" One more time,
如果你敢在大声喊一次"卡洛琳·钱宁"
I'm going to actually pull your voice box out.
老娘就把你的音箱[喉头]给扯出来
And its s so much more violent than it sounds.
做起来比听起来要暴力一百倍哦
Yes, Paul, I'll tell them.
好的 保罗 我会转告他们
There's been a little mix-up.
出现了点小状况
Five more minutes will get you right in.
五分钟后就放你们进去
You're not getting in.
你们进不去
Well, that's it. We tried.
就这样吧 至少我们试了
- We gave it our best shot. - Oh, no.
-我们尽力了 -不要
This is the clost I have ever gotten
这是我这辈子
to anything in my life almost working out.
最接近成功的一次
- We are not giving up. - How are we getting in?
-我们不能放弃 -那我们怎么进去
- Security's everywhere. - Yeah, out here,
-这全是保安 -不从这儿走
but not at the rvers' entrance.
但不是从服务员入口处
I catered this last year.
我去年不是来过吗
That's right, we're going backdoor.
没错 我们要走后门啦
That lady just punched me.
那女的打了我一拳
I knew that was gonna happen!
我就知道会有状况发生
So you can just walk in here?
你就这么大摇大摆地走进来啊
Anyone can just walk right in?
这里谁都可以随便进的吗
Well, it helps that last year
去年我是靠跟里克
I made out with the tent flap guard, Rico,
那个帐篷保安亲热 才进来的
but basically, yeah, anyone.
但基本上谁都能进
When I think of all the times
当我回想起过去
I left my pur on a table here unattended,
我把钱包仍在桌子上跑掉时
I shudder... Shudder.
我的心在颤抖啊 颤抖
Okay, so we can't get in the actual building
好啦 我们不装成服务员
without being caterers,
进不去主楼
so we have to change into tho uniforms.
所以我们得换上制服
Wait.
慢着
You never mentioned anything about
你刚可没有跟我说
a rent-a-clothes situation.
需要把礼服换掉哦
Small price to pay for us making it.
想进去总得付出点代价嘛
Is it? Is it a small price to pay?
是吗 这真的是小小的代价吗
Hurry, we have a superstar to stalk!
快点 我们得跟踪大明星呢
I thought I would hate it, but I'm kind of into it.
我原以为我会很抗拒 但我现在蛮喜欢的
我超像加奈儿·梦奈的 加奈儿·梦奈 美国另类女歌手
I'm very Janelle Monae.
No, you're Janelle I-have-no-Monae.
不 你是加奈儿·恶梦吧
What are we going to do with our dress?
那我们的礼服怎么办
We can't leave them out here. I need them inside.
不能把它们留在这里 我进里面还要穿呢
I have to look amazing when I meet Martha Stewart.
我必须美美的见玛莎·斯图尔特
What does it matter what we're wearing?
我们穿什么去见她很重要吗
We're still
going to be the two crazy girls
反正我们是两个拿着小蛋糕
chasing her down with a cupcake.
四处找她的疯婆子
That's why it matters.
所以衣着就更重要啦
I know. Here.
我知道了 这里
Help me get the shelves out of this.
帮我把架子拿出来
We can hang our dress in here
我们可以把礼服挂里面
- and push them in. - Brilliant.
-然后把它们推进去 -真聪明
Kind of like the Louis Vuitton travel wardrobe I ud to have.
这柜子有点像我以前的LV旅行衣柜
Or the rvice elevator I was born in.
或者像我妈生我时的那个电梯
Coming through, hot food.
借过 滚汤热菜
Look out, very hot! Man, it's hot.
小心 热气腾腾 天啊 热死了
You're a waiter, not a weatherman.
你是个服务员 不是气象员
Hey, pretty girls,
美女
I like the way you push around that big steel box
我喜欢你鼓捣大铁箱的方式
why don't you come over here and I'll have x with you?
你何不过来 让我打一炮
A display like that really makes you appreciate
这样赤裸裸的言语 真让人感激
Oleg's nuanced wit.
奥列格恰如其分的调戏
Okay, let's go right to the ladies room so we can change.
好吧 我们直接去女厕所换衣服吧
Is it that way or that way?
是走这边 还是那边
What?
怎么了
Shh, Johnny!
强尼也在
How'd he get invited?
怎么会邀请他
This ud to be an exclusive event.
这过去可是私人聚会
He's "Made it,"
他现在是"功成名就"
he goes where "Made it" People go.
他当然去"功成名就"的人该去的地方
Why are we hiding from that lowlife?
你干嘛躲着那个混蛋啊
If he es me in another waiter uniform,
如果他看见我穿着另一身服务生制服
I'm the sad girl always in the uniform.
我永远都是穿制服的可怜姑娘
If he es me in that dress at the ball,
如果他在舞会上看见我穿着礼服出现
he can suck it.
那他可以回家擦眼泪了
Ladies room, that way.
女厕所 在那边
The ladies room is right down here.
女厕所就在这里
Push harder.
用力推
Harder! Do you want Martha to e you dresd like that?
用力啊 你难道想穿成这样见玛莎吗
- Move! Coming through! - Excu us.
-闪开 借过 -让一下
Food emergency.
食物紧急情况
Fingers, fingers, fingers, fingers.
我的手指 手指 手指 手指
Coming through, coming through.
借过 借过
- Excu us. - Look alive, red!
-让一下 -看着点 红姑娘
- I almost hit you. - Hold up.
-我差点撞到你了 -等等
Now just hold up. What is going on right now?
你俩等等 这是怎么回事
You can't bring food in here.
你不能带食物进这儿
Oh, it's not food. That would be weird.
这不是食物 谁会带食物进来呀
It's dress. We have to change into the,
这是礼服 我们得换上它
'cau she has this guy she wants to impress,
因为她要让一个男人刮目相看
and I hav
e to change into it
而我要换是因为
becau I'm stalking Martha Stewart.
我要跟踪玛莎·斯图尔特
Ooh, I'd be a terrible spy.
啊哦 我一定是个烂间谍
Usually I don't get the long stories
通常在一晚结束后
till the end of the night,
才有人跟我讲故事
and by then, the girls are crying
那时 姑娘们会哭着
and begging me for Wisdom and tic tacs.
求我给她们长长脑子 缩缩奶子
I'll go first.
我先去
I have to get two of the in one dress.
把这"胸器"塞进一条裙子 需要点时间
Miss, do you have a shoehorn?
女士 请问你有鞋拔子吗
Come on, Chanel shoes!
快出来 香奈儿的鞋
Come on, Chanel knockoffs.
快出来 山寨香奈儿
Why are you not dresd yet?
你怎么还不换衣服
'Cau ladies take forever.
因为女人上厕所慢死了
It's all the spanx.
都怪那些塑身裤
Well, go, u my stall. I want to go stick my head out,
去 用我那间 我要伸个头出去
and e if I can scope out Johnny.
看看能不能发现强尼
No, ma'am, no! Not fair, ma'am.
不 女士 不 这不公平
Try the handicapper. This side.
试试残疾人厕所 这边
Good idea.
好主意
I cannot get a break tonight.
我今晚真是霉运不断
- Psst, yo, Max. - Johnny!
-麦克斯 -强尼
Who are you looking for?
你在找谁
The Dominos guy.
达美乐披萨仔
我躲在里面是因为再过五分钟 披萨花太长时间送到手 顾客可以免费吃
I was hiding in there, 'cau five more minutes,
the pizza's free.
披萨就能免费吃
I was hoping I'd run into you.
我还期待能遇见你呢
Eh, no big deal.
也没什么好见的
Pretty big deal. You look amazing.
当然不是 你看起美呆了
Amazing. I will go as far as amaze-balls.
美得我蛋疼菊紧 虎躯一震
Thanks.
多谢夸奖
You look like a guy in a commercial
你看起像广告里那种
who has a ring and puppy hidden somewhere.
藏着戒指和小狗的男人
Can you believe it?
你能相信吗
We're both at this shmancy thing.
咱俩身穿锦衣华服
Look how far we've gotten.
我们变化真大呀
Actually, when you think about it,
其实当你静心一想
we didn't get very far at all.
你会发现我们都没变
Nope, you're right. We didn't.
对 你说得对 的确没变
Yeah, why?
为什么
Timing, I guess.
时机不对吧
Timing?
时机
Okay, whatever.
随你怎么说吧
You know, from now on, when I think of you,
从现在开始 每当我想起你
I'm gonna think of you in this and not the uniform.
我会想着你身穿礼服 而不是制服的样子
You know, from now on,
从现在开始
maybe you shouldn't think of me at all.
或许你就不该再想我
Gotta go, Mr. Manhattan.
走啦 曼哈顿先生
That was awesome! Caroline, where are you?
太棒了 卡洛琳 你在哪里
I'm almost dresd.
我快穿好了
I just had the perfect in-your-face good-bye with Johnny.
我刚跟强尼来
了次完美的当面告别
And speaking of "in your face,"
说到"当面"
he couldn't take his eyes off my boobs...
他当着我的面 还直勾勾盯着我的胸
Boobs that he can never have,
谁让他要结婚
now that he's getting married.
这对美胸从此跟他告别了
Damn, girl, you look good. What you doing later?
靠 妹子 你真美 你晚点有活动吗
Can I get your number?
给我你的电话吗
Oh, no, the cupcake got a little smushed in my pur.
天啊 小蛋糕在我的包包有点被砸碎了
We can't show this to Martha Stewart now.
我们不能拿给玛莎·斯图尔特了
Sure, we can.
干嘛不可以
You think she never had a cupcake smush on her?
你觉得她没被人用蛋糕糊过脸吗
I doubt that very much.
我觉得没有
Martha Stewart is perfect.
玛莎·斯图尔特是个完人
Her feet don't even touch the ground.
超凡脱俗 脚不着地
The woman probably doesn't even go to the bathroom.
可能连厕所都不需要上
Martha Stewart's hardly perfect.
人无完人
And how are you this evening?
玛莎·斯图尔特本人 今晚过得好吗
No, you're right, Martha Stewart isn't perfect.
你说得对 人无完人 她也不例外
Oh, I never said that!
这话我可没说过
In fact, I hear she's a real ballbuster.
其实我听说她超爱虐男人的
You did not hear that.
你什么都没听见
Yep, a real ballbuster, you know?
真的 超爱虐男人 你知道吗
No, I do not know.
我什么都不知道
Would you mind handing me a towelette plea?
能递块毛巾给我吗
Oh, one's fine. Thank you so much.
一块就行 谢谢
But the fact that Martha Stewart is so tough...
但就是因为玛莎·斯图尔特那么强悍
Caroline, you need to get out here right now.
卡洛琳 你得马上出来
The fact that she is a real ballbuster...
那么爱虐男人
Oh, dear God, help me.
神啊 救救我吧
Is what I like and respect about her.
所以我才那么喜欢她和敬重她
I mean, the woman's a genius.
那个女人是个天才
Now it's getting interesting.
越来越有意思了
And besides, you can't really believe gossip.
而且 你不能听信传闻
Look at all that hate mail I got
瞧瞧我收到的仇恨信
with people calling me a bitch,
多少人骂我贱货啊
and I'm not a bitch.
可其实我不是
Well, that's debatable.
这有待商议
- Martha Stewart, hi. - Hello.
-玛莎·斯图尔特 你好 -你好啊
I'm Caroline, and this is my business partner, Max,
我是卡洛琳 这是我的生意伙伴麦克斯
and we have a start-up cupcake business.
我们的小蛋糕生意刚起步
Dude, are you rious? You're still going for it.
妹子 你不是吧 都这样了你还不放手啊
I know this is highly inappropriate,
我知道这非常不合时宜
but we brought a cupcake here tonight
但我们今晚带了个小蛋糕过来
in hopes that you might taste it.
衷心希望你能尝一口
So you want me
to taste your cupcake
所以你要我在女厕所
in the ladies room.
吃你的小蛋糕
What's inappropriate about that?
还有比这更不合时宜的吗
We're a start-up business. We've got to take risks.
我们的生意刚起步 不抓住机会不行啊
This is Max. She's the baker.
这位是麦克斯 她是烘培师
- You're the baker. - I'm the baker.
-你是烘培师啊 -我是烘培师
Hm, it looks quite appealing.
看起来蛮吸引人的
Oh, my God.
天啊
I know this is a social event,
我知道这是社交场合
so I'm so sorry for making it about business.
很抱歉把它弄得那么商业化
When you're in business for yourlf,
当你自己出来打拼事业时
you have to take every situation
你必须得把每一个场合
as a business opportunity.
都当作是商机
Look, I have five of the in here.
瞧 我还随身带着五本书呢
I love your magazine.
我超爱看你的家政杂志
I read every single issue
我阅读上面每一篇文章
until they realized I didn't even go to that doctor.
直到我被抓到不是看病 只是去偷看杂志
Well, in spite of the fact
我要说一句
that you have not yet washed your hands...
尽管你至今还没有洗手
I was just changing my dress in there.
我刚是在里面换衣服的
- I'll taste it. - You will?
-我会尝一口 -真的吗
I like your entrepreneurial drive.
我喜欢你的闯劲
And I have a feeling that it's actually
而且我深深地觉得
the only way I'm gonna get out of here alive.
只有尝一口 才能活着离开这儿
That is our beer batter maple bacon
这是我们的酒混面粉加枫蜜培根的
spring break cupcake.
特制春假小蛋糕
- Hm, clever name. - Thank you.
-名字不错 -谢谢
It is a little smushed, though. That's unfortunate.
不过有点糊了 真可惜
I told you.
我都说了
Mmm. Quiet tasty.
蛮好吃的
I like it.
我喜欢
Do you girls have a card?
你们有名片吗
Get it out, get it out, get it out.
拿出来 拿出来 快拿出来
Ah, thank you very much.
非常感谢
"Max's homemade cupcakes."
"麦克斯自制小蛋糕"
Well, you know who'd really like that cupcake?
你知道谁会超级喜欢你们的小蛋糕吗
Stoners.
瘾君子
She said "Max's homemade cupcakes."
她念了"麦克斯自制小蛋糕"这名字
Martha Stewart likes our cupcakes!
玛莎·斯图尔特喜欢我们的小蛋糕
Martha Stewart likes our cupcakes!
玛莎·斯图尔特喜欢我们的小蛋糕
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